Punch your imperfection in the teeth and stop being such a snoozefest. A snarky life coaching alternative for ambitious folks who want more out of life... but who vomit at the idea of real life coaching. Woo-woo sold separately.

How it Works

The specifics of how you might become a 1% better human.

See if you like us.

Take our free 21-day course. Just like all self-help courses, it won’t help you improve in any meaningful way. But it may help you decide whether we’re full of shit or not. The verdict is still out.

Pay us money.

In return for your money, we promise to give you all of the benefits of life coaching (there actually are some), wrapped up in a package that you doesn't make you want to clear your browser history.

Tear down that wall.

We’re anti woo-woo, but pro emotional vulnerability. We want to help you accept your shortcomings, love your inner self, and all that nonsense. Which sounds weird because we’re two pretty "manly" dudes who like to fart and drink beer and lift weights. But hey, we’re complex. And so are you. Hopefully.

Stop quitting.

You’re mad talented and have big dreams. Yet you’re an underachiever. Because while the rest of us are grinding it out, you pivot to something shiny and new every time your insecurities and boredom surface for a fraction of a second. We’ll help you cut that shit out.


Some people say that mortality is a blessing because it allows us to be present in this one special life. We say fuck that. Mortality sucks. But it’s true nonetheless. So why not matter to someone instead of spending your days at Bank of America?

Your Fearless Impressively Narcissistic Leaders

Hello. We’re Jeremy and Patrick. We (barely) help people lean into their feelings, accept who they are, and discover who they want to become.


I’m Jeremy Smith. I have a family and I live in Austin where I work for a tech company. But if I’m being honest I’m a moral idealist who wants his life to matter. I don’t care if I’m remembered. I just want to matter to those who knew me when I was alive.

I’m Patrick Lorenzut. One time I had a wife, a condo, an absurd tech job, and six figures in my savings account. Now I’m divorced, relatively broke, renting a bedroom in Portland... and quite possibly the most smiley human on the face of the planet.

The Things for Sale

Choose your package.

Hah, they said "package".

All payments are non-recurring. That means you will NOT be charged again and again every month... unless you manually choose to do so. Which would be lovely!

We’ll reach out to you within 72 hours of your purchase. Probably way sooner... but Patrick is hiking in Patagonia at the moment and Jeremy is really bad at these things. Don’t worry, your month doesn’t start until we start talking.